Thursday, June 01, 2006

The retraction of "The Comment"

Several months ago, when I was just beginning to lose weight, my dear, proud, German, unfiltered, mother made a rather disturbing comment to me. When she discovered how much weight that I wanted to lose, she simply said these words to me; 'If you get down to the weight you want to be, you're going to have a lot of loose flesh... because you are H-U-G-E'. Now, first of all, I want to say, that yes, for the most part my mom and I have a good relationship. I love her, and I am aware of the level of love that she has for me. It is not doubted. She just says what she wants, and when she wants. Sometimes, without thinking it through,( obviously!) Anyhow, when she came to visit today, she told me that I looked great. She's actually been saying that pretty regularly lately. And let me tell ya, she is not one to hand out a lot of compliments, to anyone. Anyways, she wanted to see my stomach, ( I know, weird). She wanted to see my stomach because it has gotten considerably smaller. And I know that she was curious about my, 'loose flesh'. She focused her attention to my torso as I lifted up my shirt, and she looked pleasantly surprised as she said, " I was expecting to see a lot of loose flesh, but you're in good shape." All I said was, 'Thanks mom, I've been working out hard five days a week, and drinking LOTS of water'. I was vindicated!I felt victorious! And you know, I wasn't even tempted to say, "See, told ya so!" So, to me, that was like a comment retraction, that was about as close to saying she was wrong as I'm probably ever going to hear. : ) But she's my mom, and I love her.

8 comments:

Paige said...

Not to sound cheezy, but what a wonderful affirmation for you!!! I know that so often, no matter how old we are, our parents praise still means the most to us. So it must have been nice to hear a compliment like that.

Chickadeeva said...

SNAP!

Neener! Neener! La da de dah dah!

Hee hee hee! I'm dancing a spritely dance of jealous love-joy!

Debbie said...

Sometimes those who love us most are the most tactless. (sigh)
What a wonderful experience to have her acknowledge your great success and hard work. Keep it up! You're such a beauty inside and out!

Lisa said...

We're a lot more elastic than we tend to give ourselves credit for - both dermatologically and emotionally.

I'm sorry her comment hurt you in the first place, but vindication (at not living down to expectations - whether you can help it or not) feels pretty good.

You are amazing, Kristina. Don't ever let anyone - whether they mean to or not, no matter how much they love you, no matter what part of you (inside or out) they are talking about - make you feel otherwise. You are a star.

Kristina said...

Oh, you guys, thank you so much for your support. Lisa and Debbie, those were especially kind words, and I really appreciated them.

Kristina

Mom2the6Rs said...

This was a beautiful post!! I can't believe that you didn't CALL ME when this took place! I would have loved to be the first to hear of it! Holy Cow! You are impressing your Mom! That is a big accomplishment in itself, Kristina. I would always duck and run when your mom came over and I was newly pregnant. "Are you pregnant again, Julie?" She would say in all her judgement...."When are you going to stop?"

Ha!

You know what, though, I bet that part of the "fire" under you to work out so much and be so faithful is from those lousy words she spoke to you many months ago. You just set out to prove her wrong and you did it! You are doing it.

Keep up the beautiful, hard, enduring work, reinventing yourself!

Jules

Pink Slippers said...

Wow, what a moment that must have been! Congratulations, you have worked incredibly hard and are doing amazing! I am so very proud of all you have done! I also really look forward to the next time I get to see you! What a difference it will be!
Tina

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