Hi Everyone~
I have to admit that I have been hiding out. I have been reading everyone's posts but avoiding posting my own therefore not having to hold myself accountable. I am really feeling down on myself. Here I am a trained consultant that consults about 100 people a week and I cannot even stay focused on my program. I started this back in January and I've only lost 13 pounds. I go to the gym and have great workouts at least 4 times a week. My problem is that I shove my feelings down with food. So anytime a feeling comes up that I don't want to feel I go to the cupboard and eat something. Lately it's been peanut butter.
Does anyone have any advice for me? I need help in a lot of ways because I want to be successful at this and stop sabotaging myself.
Congratulations to all of you! I have been keeping my eye out and I'm so proud of all of you!
Coreen
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6 comments:
Okay, Corrie. I have been in this same place you are! First of all, recognize that you are under a lot of preasure to "perform" working where you do. That alone is not easy. And two, you have lost 13 lbs! That is a great, great start, babe! Don't discount that one bit! That's more than your cute little dog weighs, is it not? And that would be a hefty size for a new born baby! Just think if someone said they just delivered a 13 lber. You would cringe for them! So chin up!
Third, You are recognizing that the eating is totally emotional, which is a great first step in beating it.
Ok, so now we have seen things a little more balanced, lets talk strategy. You need a plan to help you when the feelings come. I would suggest, first of all, either writing down your feelings or keeping a privat blog. If you write them down, you don't even have to keep them, just rip them up when you are done and throw them away...burn them if you have to. Then you need to post a list of "alternatives" on your cupboards and your refrigerator.
If I am tempted to eat because of my emotions I will choose to do one of these activities instead:
Take a walk
Play with the dog
Bubble bath
Call a good friend
Turn on the radio and dance like a fool.
Do your nails.
Make a cup of tea or coffee
Down 2 cups of water in 15 seconds.
Declutter your shoe closet
Scrapbook
(You get the point).
If these things are not helping, I really suggest talking with a professional counselor or pastor type person who can help you face your emotions in a healthy way. And don't kid yourself, if Alcohol or drugs were your way of pushing down your feelings, you would be in the same boat. Just because eating is "accepted" it is still abusing our bodies to eat emotionally. God doesn't want you bound up by that, honey. He wants you free. I want you free. Call me.
Love you, Jules
Coreen,
Listen to Julie, it is sound advice. I am 3 1/2 weeks into freedom and it is wonderful! BUT STILL VERY DIFFICULT AT TIMES. I grieve and say goodbye forever to old patterns, comfort foods, and coping mechanisms. But, if I were a drug addict emerging from rehab, and I wanted to stay 'clean', I could not go back to my same hang outs, friends, and lifestyle. It is the same with food addiction. I am keeping the friends and changing the lifestyle- permantly.
Embrace the grief and say goodbye to what is killing you (the food). I think the key to any addiction whatever it is, is this...Are you controlling it, or is it controlling you? My addiction was controlling me (for 20years). This means I actually have to FEEL those feelings I don't want to feel and learn new ways to wind down, let go, let God.
Three and a half weeks in to my program and I am still quite fragile, but I feel like I am walking a peaceful path in the meadow and a big GOD is holding my hand:)
COREEN, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! YOU CAN DO IT!
SueAnne
Corrie,
Julie's advice is sound. I think I'm most effective dealing with my emotional reactions (or my 'imps') when I don't deny they exist, but rather give them a 'safe' thing to do.
For example, when I get emotional, sometimes I want to spend too much money. Rather than denying myself the 'retail therapy' I go to the Goodwill or thrift store where I can indulge my 'imp' without causing negative backlashes, (like bad checks).
My suggestion to you is to indulge your imp in a safe way - distract it, or give it something safe to do (gnaw on carrots) where the backlash or result will actually be a postitive one.
If you should fail and start to eat a whole big thing of peanut butter, do yourself a favor - when you're blissing out on the indulgence, 'bookmark' the feeling in your head.
That bliss is what you're looking for. Then, see if you can find another activity, a 'safer' activity that gives you the same bliss out. You'll be rewarding your brain (the brain doesn't know the difference between one activity and another) by allowing it the same satisfying rush, but you won't be punishing yourself with residual backlash.
All I have to say is Listen to Jules, Sueanne and Chick, I know I have and it is working!!
Hi Corrie,
I also do a lot of working out and am at the gym 4 days a week. Heavy workouts cause the muscles to retain water and swell. So you have to really fill up on the water. Julie was right on. You have lost 13lbs. Don't discount that, and don't give up. Finding new ways to reward yourself is a fun way of doing self discovery. What makes you feel loved by you, outside of food. Find that, do that. We're in the same boat and we're here for you. I have been doing this for 3 years, and know all the plateaus, ups, downs, and sideways. Believe me!!! You CAN do this.
When you eat the wrong thing or quantity, Jule's right.....write it down and figure out what the trigger is. If you can determine what and where the eating happens, you can avoid it.
Be proud of what you have accomplished and don't look back. Full steam ahead!
Thank you for all of your advice ladies I really appreciate all of it and I will take all of this advice in and see which ones work the best.
Thanks again:)
Coreen
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