Friday, September 01, 2006

Failures

Hello everyone,

It is much more fun being honest when you are on the wagon and flying high, but I am still stumbling. In fact, I am caught in that same cycle of addiction. Every day I wake up thinking it is a new day and I will do better. The pain, anxiety, and fatigue that comes with it (fybromyalsia-hate it!). I tried writing all my food planned out on my journal ahead of time. Didn't work. I am using again (mochas). Yesterday, I contemplated binging on as much chocolate as I could possibly eat, making myself sick, ya know? Like a little aversion therapy. I didn't, but I hit the dessert table at a church meeting last night and feel like I have been hit by a mack truck this morning.

I am loving reading your successes. And yes, Kimi, I would love to ride together for the fall frolic.
Right now, I am just going to go turn on some worship music and worship...
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7 comments:

kimiko said...

SueAnne,
I am so sorry you are having a hard time right now. I wish I had magic words to make you feel better and brighter. What I will say comes from my own up and down success and faliures. I have come to understand through this weight loss journey that the good work God has begun in me he will bring to completion. Both with my attitude towards food and my daily actions. There are days when I eat more than I should, there are days when I crave chocolate and there are days when I want a big greasy hamburger. I usually don't have the will power to say no, so I eat. But 9 days out of 10 I am making the right choices and working my but off in the gym and with power walking. I have learned to look at the good I have accomplished during my day or my week and not dwell on those faliures. It will drive you crazy! These are a few things I do when I need some of my trigger items, I hope this helps!
Chocolate:
Dove has small idividual bites of dark chocolate. If you can limit your self to just one, it is only 50 calories. And Dark Chocolate is good for you!
Better yet:
No sugar added fudgesciles. Yummy. only 40 calories and 1.5 grams of fat. This usually satisfies me.

instead of a Mocha have a sugar free Hot chocolate (comes in idividual packets) and make it with fat free milk if you want it creamier. Top off with light whipped cream in the can, only 1 gram of sugar.

Be encouraged my friend. This is a marathon and not a sprint, give your self a little breathing room.

I saw you on Sunday walking down the aisle and I thought you looked fantastic!
Smiles,
Kimiko

7:50 AM
Mom2the6Rs said...

SueAnne, I love you. I believe in you.


Jules

9:56 AM
Kristina said...

SueAnne,
I'm sorry that you're having a hard time of it. This weeke has been hard for me too. I'm going to start my period it feels like any minute, and I've given to some of my cravings. And not just one day, either. I am continually working out and walking, so I think that's what's saving my bacon. That, and drinnking gobs of water. When we feel stressed, it's much easier to succumb.
Please know, that no one is condemning you. Accept for perhaps yourself. Give yourself some grace. Look at some pictures of yourself when you were 30 pounds heavier, and think about how amazing you feel compared to then.
We are here for you girlfriend!

Love, Kristina

11:08 AM
Paige said...

SueAnne,
I'm so sorry you're having a rough time right now, also. I've been there, done that, and am struggling with what to say to help. I don't really remember what turned the corner for me, except realizing how important it was for my health to lose weight.
I guess I want to tell you that you can do this. I know it. If I can, you can. You are admitting the place that you are in, you are still coming here. You are still trying, and right now that's important. I hope you can make up your mind to 'do' and soon, but in the meantime we're all here to support you in any way we can.
~Paige

2:58 PM
Chickadeeva said...

SueAnne,

Fibromyalgia sux. When you are in pain, nothing sounds good - except things that aren't...and when you hurt, goshumgolly - what's a little chocolate to make life worth living. (I love KIMI's idea!)

But in the big scheme of things, I know this is not where you want to be - you want to be in charge, not charged over.

Know we're with you. Me especially as a friend in pain. Just do what you can, wholeheartedly.

4:33 PM
Tracy said...

Sue Anne-
I think we ALL know where you are at with your diet struggles. I am sorry that you are having such a hard time. Kristina had a good idea about looking at a picture when you were heavier. Maybe post that picture on the fridge or in your car so you can see it when you go get your mocha.
Even though Jules is the only one of you all I have met, I feel a connection with you gals. I care about you Sue Anne, have a great weekend.
Tracy

7:31 PM
SueAnne said...

Wow! Thank you ladies. My browser wasn't picking up the comments so I just got these. Thanks so much. My future is looking brighter:)
SueAnne

10:32 PM

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