This is time consuming...but well worth it.

May 25th I began a journey that will last the rest of my life. I wrote this on my other blog May 26th.

My summer will be filled with becoming Sugar Free. WHAT? you may ask. I have been struggling the past 12 months with stalled out weight loss. I just thought I was crazy. I am moody, irritable, binging, and plateaued on weight loss. I have struggled and struggled. I started working out 4 days a week back in January and still have not lost any more weight. Monday, I had had enough. I bowed my head on the treadmill and cried to God to help me find what was wrong.
Tuesday, a book I had ordered from Paper Back Swap came called Your Last Diet. I read it from cover to cover. It was as if the author had read my mind and knew just what was going on in my head.

I am sugar sensitive. I have begun to become sugar free. I am only on Step 1 (adding protein to my breakfast) but I know this is what I had been praying for. I already am feeling more alive and better than I have in the past 12 months. Let the journey begin!!!

OK: I have added Step 2 and Step 3 also now. It has now been 16 days and low and behold, my body has started to realize I am not starving it. I have felt better mentally and physically than I have all year. Part of this program is to take it ssssslllloooowwwlllyyyy. Do not hurry which I am prone to do. I want quick results and I WANT IT NOW!!. I knew I had an addictive personality but no one had hit the nail on the head and identified that SUGAR was the thing that called my name.

If I need to stay in these three steps for a while then I will. Weight has started to come off but I realize this is not the most important part. The mental stability and physical stability is more important. By journaling not only what I eat but also how I feel at the time has helped me see when I eat over feelings, boredom, stress, loneliness, etc.

I started January 2006 at 306. (part of this journey is admiting how much I weight which is hard as I have always lied about it). I lost 30 on Weight Watchers and since October of last year I have not lost any more. God has helped me learn through this time that only HE can be the one I rely on and that I must be willing for Him to be in control. Setting Captives Free was great in teaching me that God is in control of this eating.

I have gained and lost the same 10 pounds over and over since then. I am getting off of this roller coaster and onto the slow boat to China (ok, not China, but health). It is hard work. Summer is great to do this and God knew I needed the slow pace of summer in which to succeed. He waited until we were done with school to bring this into my life. He knows me so well. I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for His love and care of me.

If you are still reading this, thanks for the prayers and love this past year as I struggled and struggled, had some success and then failed again. I will fail again but now I am on the road to recovery instead of weight loss. I am on the road to sanity instead of craziness. I am on the road to wholeness instead of scatteredness. I am a sugar addict and it totally messes with me. Now I am becoming sugar free and with God and my family here to see me through, I will continue to feel better.