Introduction :)

My name is also Kristina. I think it reads Kris when I post, but I can go by anything you want :) as long as it is nice. I am 30 years old and a SAHM to 2 very active kids. I have been married for 13 years in July to a great guy.

I have been on many diets through out my life. I was a very active and skinny kid, up until Jr. High, when I started gaining weight. I have lost many pounds over the years to have it come back with friends. In April I lost a baby at 16 weeks and I decided then and there that I needed to get this weight off for good. To be healthy for my children and future children. I have missed out on a lot of life, because of my weight.

I started my journey on June 8, 2007. It took me a couple months to recover from the miscarriage. I have lost 24.8 pounds as of today. I have a lot to go, but am excited for the challenge. My personal blog is www.buddingblossoms.blogspot.com
Thanks for inviting me to this blog Jules. I have had fun reading about all you great ladies and think you all are doing a great job.
Kris

Costco Cookie Conundrum

This weekend was marked by one bad decision after another, and I'm still feeling hungover from the sugar I ate yesterday. Oh, it could be the Benedryl I took last night. I'll bet that's it. Anyway, I missed my big training walk after being up all night with a sick child, felt bad about that, had 3 glasses of wine Saturday night, woke up feeling like doing nothing. Big surprise, huh? Then I met my walking teammates for lunch on Sunday, had soup and salad and water. (Yay me! Trying to remember to give myself credit.)

After lunch I stopped at Costco for a few groceries. I was at the front, almost had gotten to the checkout line, and I TURNED AROUND and headed for the bakery section. I didn't even bother rationalizing the cookies I bought, instead I just told myself I WANT ONE. I did tell myself I'd only have one. Ha! I didn't even keep track of how many I ate. Then I had nachos for dinner. I didn't drink enough water for the rest of the day either.

So what went wrong? I missed my training walk and did have negative thoughts like I'm not going to be ready for this walk. Next week's training walk is going to be really hard now. My husband brought home beer, which always leads me to ask, "Did you bring me some wine?" Well, he had, but he left it out in the car. He was trying to cover his bases. Cheeky devil. Do you see why I didn't ask him to be my diet coach? Ha!

After drinking wine, I always feel sort of out of it the next day. It's almost like I'm mildly depressed again. I think it must deplete serotonin or something. That's my theory anyway. So, at Costco I was tired and sort of out of it, and that led to the cookie purchase. After eating one cookie I think I had some version of the well, now I might as well just blow the whole day negative thought process going on.

Here I am on Monday trying to get back on track. I need a way to deal with fatigue and stress that doesn't lead to eating or drinking alcohol. And today I need a way to get motivated and back on track.

Keeping my Cool & Making a Plan

I have gotten stuck, yet again, at 6-8 pounds heavier than I was last September. Muy frustrating. Yet I'm so anxious about everything else in my life right now that I feel like I'm perpetually only 5 minutes away from a small-scale panic attack - whether it be about my weight, my house, my job, my closet, my schedule, you name it. This doesn't happen to me. I'm not (usually) prone to panic. And I don't like it.

So here is my strategy, to solve all my problems in one fell swoop. I will wear myself out, physically. I always sleep best when at the end of the day I am just dog tired. I will do this by upping the walking I am doing, running when I feel like it, playing more tennis, kicking around the soccer ball when bored, and leaving work at work when I head out the door. I will stop when I am tired, and I will not cause injury to myself by overdoing anything. I will drink enough water so that I'm not so thirsty all the time, and I will calm down.

To that end, today's plan is: tennis (singles) tonight, at a park 2 miles from my house. The game starts at 7:30, so if I leave home at 7 I should make it to the park on time and have a half hour to listen to my new audiobook on my ipod and unwind from work. After we play, I will have another half-hour walk in which I can cool down after the game. If, after I get home and have dinner, I still feel wound up, I will take my neighbor up on her offer to join her in her nightly walk through the neighborhood.

Hopefully this will do the trick. I really hate being just a huge ball of stress because this really is not in my personality.

I've earned my brown "star" or level at the Y!

I've accumulated enough fit points to make it to the brown level a couple of days ago. You need to have 75,000 points to get to this level, so I'm pretty excited. : ) I'm calculating to reach my next level in 2 1/2 to 3 months. Each level they increase the points you have to earn, so this next one will be a toughie. Anyhow, I don't want to bore you guys, most of you don't even have membership, so you're not even sure what I'm talking about. : )

Saturday:
1,471 calories, and 11 glasses of water. I took a break from the Y today.

Sunday:
1,531 calories, and 18 glasses of water. I did 67 minutes of cardio, and burned 967 calories.

Haven't posted in awhile...

Hey, all. I have been MIA for awhile, sorry. Hmmm, where to start with my weight loss journey...well, as some of you know, after losing 70 lbs., I have just been maintaining for the last 5 months. This is good in that I have learned the "skill" of maintainence, but bad in that I haven't moved forward to attain my goal of 140 lbs. Just writing that number seems crazy to me. I have been vascilating between 161 and 164 now for so long. I keep losing and regaining the same 3 pounds. I have lost them enough times, accumulatively, to have reached my goal, and then some....so I am stuck.

In February, I believe, I had my sights set on bathing suit season and being able to get into a smaller sized suit, because I had plenty of time to achieve such a goal. June is here...didn't happen.

I just need to focus again. Focus on my dreams. I know the right formula. I just need to apply myself like Kristina and Jennifer and move ahead.

I need some cheerleading, I suppose. But putting my issues aside, I must say that I am so proud of all of you ladies, wheather you post often or just cheer the others on. We need each other and I am so proud of this place of community that we have created.

Love you all.
Jules

A Few Challenges

My weight is down another pound since Thursday. I'm really hoping I don't undo that. My first challenge was early last night. I remembered I had nothing to take along on my 12 mile training walk so I asked my husband to run out and get me some power bars and wheat thins. (I remembered another walker eating wheat thins on one of our walks.)

Well, having a box of "munchies" in the house presented a challenge and I think I had three or four unplanned handfuls of those. So, no more munchies for training walks. Either that or I need to have an individual serving package or something.

My next challenge this weekend is that I didn't go on my training walk because my 8 year old was up puking all night. Now I'm sitting here thinking I need to at least get a few miles in, but walking alone is easier to blow off than meeting with friends, and that's what I'm doing. I'm blowing it off minute by minute. I'm really having a tough time getting myself moving today. So, I'm going to get off the computer, read a bit of my book, which I just realized I've ignored for the last 2 days. (Need to work on consistency)

Now I'm going to spend a few minutes giving myself credit for what I have done well the last few days. I've made some really good food choices. I've been eating breakfast, whole grains, adding veggies and fruit, drinking plenty of water. I started my period and didn't binge once. I ended a plateau by losing weight last week, and some more over the last few days. I resisted those pink frosted sugar cookies that my mom had over at her house, even though I love those, even though I was really hungry, and I'm not sorry I didn't have them. In fact, I had completely rationalized that having one wouldn't be so bad. They are only 210 calories (per serving? Is giant cookie more than 1 serving? I didn't even look at that.) I'll eat a lighter lunch. Yada yada yada. But still, I recognized the rationalization for what it was and didn't have a cookie. I decluttered my closet and my dresser drawers so I have no more fat clothes, nor do I have any more clothes that are more than 1 size too small. When I get smaller it will be my joy and pleasure to buy more clothes!

Okay, that's it for today's coaching session. I'm off to do some reading and search for the motivation to get walking.

I so feel like celebrating over here!!!

I'm down another two pounds! I'm officially into the LOW 170's! 172.5 to be exact. I can't believe it, really I can't. I remember being extatic about just barely breaking into the 170's, and now getting into the 160's seems so completely doable. I only have 12.5 pounds to get to my goal you guys. : ) I'm flying high ladies, I'm flying high!

Friday's numbers:
1,605 calories, and 14 glasses of water. I did 50 minutes of cardio, burning 721 calories, and lifted 32,000 pounds.

It's official!

I got that extra half of a pound this morning. I'm down to 174.5... 80.5 pounds lost baby! My lowest weight since I began a year and a half ago. Whoooo!!!

Yesterday's numbers:
1,571 calories, and 16 glasses of water. I did 57 minutes of cardio, burning 890 calories, and lifted 66,500 pounds.

I Need a Diet Coach

In the book I'm reading (The Beck Diet Solution) the next step of the program is to find a diet coach. It occurred to me that coaching each other is exactly what this blog was set up for so I'm wondering if you will all be my coaches.
Here is what the book says about my "meetings" with my coach:

"Ideally, schedule a regular time to talk (face-to-face if possible), at least once a week and then in between by phone or by e-mail on an as-needed basis--daily, if necessary.

During your scheduled weekly meetings, you should talk about:

• Your change in weight during the past week. You don't have to state your actual weight, just how much the scale went up or down.
• The successes you had during the past week. Use the to-do lists at the end of each day to report on what you've done. Mention anything else that you deserve credit for, so your diet coach can positively reinforce what you've done.
• The struggles you had in the past weel. Talk about your cravings, slipups, or life stressors. Mention anything that might interfere with executing the steps of this program. Ask your coach to help you find ways to deal with setbacks and challenges in the future. Report your sabotaging thoughts and ask for help with how to respond to them."

The book goes on to outline other times I should initiate contact with my coach such as before entering a high-risk situation, like a party.


Right now I'm working, as per the program, on eating when sitting down only, eating slowly and mindfully, reading my advantages response card at least twice daily, and giving myself credit for all helpful dieting behaviors. (Good job me, for writing this post and asking for help!)

I'm finding that many of the behavior modifications and the diet preparations in the first week of this program are things that I've already dealt with. Like for today I'm supposed to work on preparing my environment for a diet. I did that a long time ago. If I had Doritos and Cheetos in my house I would not have lost 38 pounds so far!

So what do you say? Will you all be my coaches? I thought I'd step up my accountability here and report not only my successes, but my mistakes, and make Thursday my official day to check in.

Oh, and I updated my ticker today. I'm down 2.6 pounds this week! The book has really helped me refocus and I'm feeling more motivated again.

Six week journal report

I can't believe it's already been six weeks since I've started journaling again. I'm feeling so, SOOO much better! Down 16.5 pounds exactly. I was really looking for that extra half of a pound this morning, but alas, I've maintained at 175 since Monday. I'm not complaining, I'm just trying to get below my lowest weight since I've started this journey, almost a year and a half ago. Right now, I've tied it. : )

Tuesday: 1,716 calories, and 12 glasses of water. I did 40 minutes of cardio, burning 570 calories, and lifted 66,400 pounds.

Wednesday: 1,610 calories, and 15 glasses of water. I did 65 minutes of cardio, burning 904 calories, and lifted 43,300 pounds.

High or Low Intensity?

A really interesting article:

A Case Against Cardio (from a former mileage king)

A funny conversation from the Y...

Yesterday as I was in the weight room, I had a conversation with another gal who is about my same age. Anyhow, I've never really talked to her much before, other than saying hello. But this is how our conversation went;' So, I 've heard from so and so that you've lost eighty pounds?!' 'Yes I have.' 'Wow!' said she. 'Yeah, I have another fifteen to go'. 'Really?! I think that you already look like you are in amazing shape... you're very fortunate, you're one of those "curvy" girls, and you are perfectly porportioned. Where do you want to lose it from?' 'Thank you,' said I, but you've never seen me in my underpants. If you had, then you would KNOW'. : )

Monday's numbers:
1,616 calories, and 20 glasses of water. I did 30 minutes on the elliptical, burning 452 calories, and I lifted 45,600 pounds.

The Beck Diet Solution

I'm reading a book called The Beck Diet Solution by Judith S. Beck, Ph.D. It's not a diet, but rather a way to train yourself to think differently about food and dieting so that you can be successful at losing weight and maintaining your weight loss no matter which diet plan you choose. This is what I wrote today on my blog about my progress using this plan.

According the program laid out in The Beck Diet Solution, I need to create response cards. These are cards designed to be carried around and pulled out when sabotaging thoughts pop up, things like I just blew my diet with that chocolate cake so I might as well eat whatever I want for the rest of the day. That would be considered a sabotaging thought. One I've had myself more than once.

The first response card I was instructed to create was a list of reasons to lose weight. I'm supposed to read it twice a day and whenever else I feel tempted to stray from my diet. I'm on day 2 of the plan now, so I can't tell you whether it works or not, but it fits in with what I'm trying to do anyway, which is gain more control over what I eat, and change for a lifetime, not just lose weight for an event, only to gain it all back.

This is my list of reasons that I am now carrying around in my purse:

• I want to feel good.
• I want more energy.
• I want a long life.
• I want to wear cute clothes!
• I want to be more confident.
• Reaching my goal weight would be a great accomplishment.
• No more obsessing over what my body looks like.
• I want to smile when I look in the mirror.
• I want to swim in public.
• I want to be strong.
• I want to dance without being embarrassed.
  
• Clothes shopping will be fun again.
  
• Better sex. (I should say even better sex.)
• I want to be a good role model for my kids and others.
• My mom will be proud of me.
• I won't worry about what my in-laws think of me. (Although no one has ever given me any reason to believe they think ill of me, I imagine them thinking, Oh, our poor son married a pretty girl and look at her now. Silly, I know.)
• I want to be THIN for my 20th anniversary.
• I want to be a HOTTIE when I'm forty!
  

I've lost EIGHTY pounds!!!

I'm down another two pounds, to my amazement. I hosted a birthday party for my younger two sons on Saturday, and even allowed myself a piece of cake. In addittion to that, I went out to dinner with my hubby on Friday night too. I suppose all of my working out is really paying off. : )
I must confess though, I did hit the 80 pound mark once in December. But I only maintained that weight for about two days, (seriously). And then I started to gain again. Well that's not happenning this time girlfriends, NO WAY!!

Yesterday's numbers:
1,670 calories, and 13 glasses of water. I ran for an hour, burning 856 calories. No weights today.

I was able to run for an entire hour!

I'm so proud of myself! I've never been able to run for a whole hour. Usually, when I do a lot of cardio, I do it 50/50 with the elliptical and the treadmill, because running is harder for me. Anyhow, I was feelin' a little like Forrest Gump tonight, I just felt like a runnin'. : ) So, sixty minutes, 5.7 miles, 856 calories later... here I am!

Here's my numbers:
Thursday: 1,480 calories, and 13 glasses of water. I did 71 minutes of cardio, burning 1,015 calories, and lifted 40,500 pounds.

Friday: 1,885 calories, and 9 glasses of water. I did 60 minutes of cardio, burning 838 calories, and lifted 37,400 pounds.

Saturday: 1,604 calories, and 9 glasses of water. I didn't go to the Y today, I was hosting a birthday party

On Wardrobes and Paradoxes

I'm not sure how this happened, but even as I am losing weight I am apparently expanding.

My firm is a business-casual environment so I only have to wear a suit when I'm meeting with clients who expect it (some don't and I love them for that) or going to court. Or interviewing. I have an interview with a firm that I would really love working for in a couple of hours so last night I was picking out what to wear. I want to come across as professional but not trying too hard. A plain black suit was out for this reason. I tried on my favorite pinstripe suit which fit perfectly last fall but got tight around Christmas. Since I have lost a lot (but admittedly not all) of the weight I gained over Christmas (but still weigh a lot less than the first time I was actually able to put on the suit and wear it in public), I figured it would work. Sadly, I was wrong, and the poor zipper practically sobbed as I zipped it up.

Of course, I have other suits that will work - in fact, I'm wearing one right now - but this somewhat mystifies me. I seem to be expanding, even though my weight is shrinking. Begging the question - where exactly am I losing this weight?

I'm stumped, but I hope it's nowhere important.

Anyway, wish me luck. I'm nervous (which really never happens to me) so I could definitely use it.

Hasta luego,

Lisa

My 14th wedding anniversary!

Blake and I have enjoyed 14 wonderful years together! What an amazing journey we are on! I spent the day walking down memory lane, watching my wedding video and looking through scrapbooks and mementos with my children. Reese, my 4 yo, wanted to know where he was at during my wedding ceremony. He was convinced that he was in his "class". And when we were delayed driving away after the reception because I couldn't find my purse, he was certain that I had left my purse with him, in his "class". He remembered....so cute.

At dinner (I enjoyed the Copper River salmon) I asked Blake if there was one thing that has surprised him about me in our marriage, he said, "Well, I never expected you to look like you do now..." That was very gratifying. He also said I looked "hot" when we walked into the restaurant, after being complemented as "cute" for most of my life, but NEVER "hot", that was also a confidence booster. I am so glad that I have put my health first these past 18 months.

I'm reaching hard for my goal!

I'm down another 1.5 pounds from last week. Just 17 more to go you guys, just 17 more! I'm down exactly 78 pounds now... I can't wait until I actually push past the 80 pound mark. Hopefully within the next few weeks, I will. I am just so pumped this morning.
Today marks my 5th week of journaling, and In that time I've lost 14.5. It's amazing how even just that much weight can boost a person's confidence. I'm just feeling so good about myself.

Tuesday: 1,611 calories, and 12 glasses of water. I did 45 minutes of cardio, burning 709 calories, and lifted 46,100 pounds.

Wednesday: 1,601 calories, and 16 glasses of water. I did 62 minutes of cardio, burning 900 calories, and lifted 45,100 pounds.

Old Photos of Kris and Julie!

A visual of the shrinking lady

We all agree Kris is gorgeous at any weight. This is a visual of her physical body as compared in the two pictures. (her head isn't on here as it is unnecessary to compare beauty to beauty)

Black: before
Blue - After